College admission season is here and students all around the world are anxiously waiting to hear back from their dream schools. Five years ago, I was in your shoes, and it was the worst feeling in the world. The anxiety and uncertainty is a silent killer. I remember receiving my first email in my best friend’s room. It was a rejection; I was not accepted into my first choice university. I cried. I pretended like I didn’t care. And then I remembered that I really did care and I cried some more. I felt like I wasn’t smart enough; I wasn’t good enough. What I wasn’t able to register at the time is that my acceptance into a school does not determine my self-worth.

I am proud to say, though, that five years later, I am so grateful for how my life is playing out. Because of this decision, I ended up going to a university that my college counselor had to convince me to apply to.

In my case, I was hesitant about the idea of attending a Historically Black College/University (HBCU). I went to a Predominantly White Institution (PWI) all four years of high school, so everyone expected me to go to another one. Because my parents are immigrants, I was not raised learning about the history and significance of HBCUs. But rather, going to an Ivy League school was considered the more favorable choice.

I was reserved about my college counselor’s advice that when I received my acceptance email, I just shrugged it off. It felt like just another email to mark as read.

With confidence, I can now say that her pushing me to do something different led to some of the most iconic years of my short 22 years of life.

I am a believer in the sentiment that everything happens for a reason, but at the moment I didn’t understand what that reason was. I did not know what plan God or the universe was planning for me. Yet somehow, I was being set up for an experience beyond my wildest dreams. I just know that I was sad and angry. And my self-worth felt crushed.

The Unpredictability of the College Admissions Process

I was on the board of every club. I’m smart. I have so much to offer. But for some reason I didn’t get into about 60 percent of my schools. It is important to also note that of some of the top 100 colleges and universities in the country, at least 50% had acceptance rates below 25% in 2022, according to U.S. News.

Similarly to my younger sister, as many of you wait for the rest of your decisions to come out, I remind you that everything works out.

For some of you, this may be your first time experiencing rejection, whether it’s from your first choice school or even a school you might not even think you care about. And that is completely okay. Your self-worth is not dependent on how many acceptances you get. Your worth comes from within. Each and every one of you have so much to offer whatever community you choose to be part of.

College is only one part of the crazy journey we call life. A rejection will not determine your future, neither will the school you attend. The only thing that has the power to determine your future is you.

Take this time to reflect on what it means to experience and bounce back from rejection. The college admissions process sometimes makes no sense, and it is all about how we grow from these experiences.

What follows after college is going to change the trajectory of your life is you want it to. Trust in the process. And prepare for life to surprise you in the best ways.

Good luck wherever you choose to attend. Trust your gut. And everything will work out.